Tick, Tick, Tick
I told one of my co-workers today that I feel like a time bomb. At some point in the next few weeks, I am not going to be a pretty sight and I'd like to feel that I have some sort of control over when and where but it all depends on the medical professionals.
What the rest of you probably don't realize is that a large number of my fellow Canadians are very proud of our medical system. The key to this view is that yes, some of us may get to walk around with a dead embryo (or as I call it, Frankenstiny) but you see, I can't simply flash some money around and have access to better quality ultrasound machines. Well, actually I could but only in the context of an entire IVF cycle.
So my access to high quality ultrasounds might be lacking but.... so is everyone else's access. And this is the beauty of the system. WE ALL GET PRETTY MUCH THE SAME SERVICE. Okay, so maybe it's crappy service but it's UNIVERSAL! (at least in Canada). Please, please, do not let the phrase "two tier medical system" ever touch your lips (unless with a negative connotation).
I am not actually all that certain that failure to find a heartbeat on Thursday will actually be the end of this entire saga. My Dr. asked if I was interested in "some sort of procedure" if (??) there is still no heartbeat. Um, YES.
Last time I had a D&C, there were about 10 of us waiting our turns in a large room. We each had a small cot and we each had privacy curtains pulled once we had our IVs in place. I was the oldest patient in the room by a good two decades. I could just see these young girls looking at me and thinking "look at you, at your age you should certainly know about birth control". Yes, I do. Unfortunately for my husband and I, we appear to use the form of birth control known as recurrent miscarriage.
I went to numerous rallies in the 80s to ensure that all those girls would have access to abortion services and I would do it again if needed. But if any of them had asked me if I would take their baby if they went through with the pregnancy, I would have said yes in a heartbeat. Without regard to race, health background, genetically linked diseases,....
Actually, I would have taken all of the babies that would have been up for offer. I'm not sure how I would have explained having 8 or 9 babies materialize in the space of a month or so but I've never really known how to explain all the miscarriages either and that's never stopped me.
Anyway, here's to being put in a room with a multitude of teenage girls who are ending their pregnancy voluntarily and somewhat traumatically - I promise I won't approach any of them with "an offer"
DinoD
I told one of my co-workers today that I feel like a time bomb. At some point in the next few weeks, I am not going to be a pretty sight and I'd like to feel that I have some sort of control over when and where but it all depends on the medical professionals.
What the rest of you probably don't realize is that a large number of my fellow Canadians are very proud of our medical system. The key to this view is that yes, some of us may get to walk around with a dead embryo (or as I call it, Frankenstiny) but you see, I can't simply flash some money around and have access to better quality ultrasound machines. Well, actually I could but only in the context of an entire IVF cycle.
So my access to high quality ultrasounds might be lacking but.... so is everyone else's access. And this is the beauty of the system. WE ALL GET PRETTY MUCH THE SAME SERVICE. Okay, so maybe it's crappy service but it's UNIVERSAL! (at least in Canada). Please, please, do not let the phrase "two tier medical system" ever touch your lips (unless with a negative connotation).
I am not actually all that certain that failure to find a heartbeat on Thursday will actually be the end of this entire saga. My Dr. asked if I was interested in "some sort of procedure" if (??) there is still no heartbeat. Um, YES.
Last time I had a D&C, there were about 10 of us waiting our turns in a large room. We each had a small cot and we each had privacy curtains pulled once we had our IVs in place. I was the oldest patient in the room by a good two decades. I could just see these young girls looking at me and thinking "look at you, at your age you should certainly know about birth control". Yes, I do. Unfortunately for my husband and I, we appear to use the form of birth control known as recurrent miscarriage.
I went to numerous rallies in the 80s to ensure that all those girls would have access to abortion services and I would do it again if needed. But if any of them had asked me if I would take their baby if they went through with the pregnancy, I would have said yes in a heartbeat. Without regard to race, health background, genetically linked diseases,....
Actually, I would have taken all of the babies that would have been up for offer. I'm not sure how I would have explained having 8 or 9 babies materialize in the space of a month or so but I've never really known how to explain all the miscarriages either and that's never stopped me.
Anyway, here's to being put in a room with a multitude of teenage girls who are ending their pregnancy voluntarily and somewhat traumatically - I promise I won't approach any of them with "an offer"
DinoD
posted by DinosaurD at 3:44 PM
6 Comments:
Oh, Dino. I am just dying inside. I never imagined that these days would turn into weeks; and that these weeks would be so painful for you. I don't know much about the Canadian health system, but just knowing the hell it's put you through makes me grateful for the "unfairness" of the system in the States.
It may seem trite, but since I can't be there personally: (((hugs))).
I don't know what to say other then I hope it all works out for you. Know that I am thinking of you and just want you to be ok, regardless of the final outcome. You know that Pollyanna wishes that a heartbeat miraculously appears but she also knows the likelyhood of that is very small.
I am here for you whatever happens.
As someone who lives in that country south of yours but in the state that borders it (Okay fine I live in Michigan) I can not fathom how any medical professional thinks that this kind of wait is "okay"... now that part comes from the medical person I am... I think I'll stick with my screwy coverage... that is way overpriced just for the uh speedy service in regards to d/c's and hte like... Would you like me to go kick your doctor? Seriously I'm itching to kick something for you...
I'm praying for the bomb to be detonated at a set time that you have decided on rather than what the bomb (aka frankensteiny) decides.
I'm sorry dino, this is just tortuous, it must be absolutely horrible to have this just drag on with no hope. I hope they get their act together soon and you get to have this be over with.
I understand your frustration. The standard of care you're getting sucks, and the fact that it's egalitarian is little consolation.
But to be honest, I'm in favor of equal access to health care as a principle. I don't think private treatments should be banned absolutely either.
I'm very grateful that IF treatment is offered by the national health service (my taxes put to good use!) where I live. I think its horrible that so many women are at the mercy of private insurance corporations.
I hope they stop giving you the runaround.
Dear Dino, I'm so sorry this agony is dragging on so long -- that must be so hard to bear.
Your story of waiting with teenagers getting abortions was so... ironic. And to go on with this understatement, I wish there were a little less irony and a lot more happiness in your life right now.
Thinking of you and wishing you well.
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